she flopped and people were killed
i like staying in the house and doing nothing when it’s my choice. when it’s not my choice i am scratching at the front door with bloodied hands and fingernails wailing like my husband just went away to war and i know he’s not coming home
sorry i lied. i don’t really have covid. i got caught up in illegal cum gargling and it got into my lungs and i got an infection
The ideal woman
this is the lady that struts in to restaurants and gives them their michelin stars. tits out the whole way through
Anonymous asked:
I honestly don't even believe that you have the corona virus. It would be really convincing with every other lie you've spun. It's not something to joke about and it's sad sow far you'll go to get a couple dollars for God knows what. Maybe you're only looking for simpathy or pity. That is so sad..
Please give me simpathy :)
if your circle isn’t discussing penis, cock, dick, or balls, it’s time for you to find a new circle
that is not what i meant to add whoops
If monster girls/boys ever became real, posts on /r/relationships would include species along with age and sex.
“My (M21 Human) girlfriend (F22 Lamia) keeps shedding all over the house. How do I tell her that’s my fetish without being weird?”
“Dude what the fuck that is INCREDIBLY WEIRD. And I (Human M26) like how my wife (Dragon F240) cooks. Also don’t come at me with that age difference, dragons live longer then humans it’s just natural and we’re okay with that.”
‘My (Human M23) wife (Cowfolk F26) wants to breastfeed me, but I’m not sure how comfortable I am with that. Her milk tastes fine, but it just seems… weird to me. What should I do?”
Top comment with Reddit Gold: “TOUCH THE COW DO IT NOW”
